I have a vivid memory of standing with my mom in her bedroom as she went through her closet, bemoaning that she had nothing to wear. I was probably 4 or so. I didn’t understand what she meant — there were clothes everywhere.
Now she is me. My own closet is full of vintage dresses that will never fit the same way again — and even if they did, they would still be wrong. More vexing, the shirts and sweaters that I actually wear every day — well, let’s just say there really is a clothing lifespan, and mine are in gross violation of the limit.
We all know the psychic lift that some new clothes can bring — apparently a region of the brain called the ventral striatum gives us this drive for novelty — to make, to do, to find something new. And mine is still buzzing from a much anticipated birthday shopping spree I got to take a couple of weekends ago.
It wasn’t over the top. It was gift certificate-funded. I got some new sweaters and shirts. A badly needed new spring coat. And a purse.
But the difference has been amazing. I don’t know if I stand straighter or what, but at the grocery store the other night, me in my spring jacket, a dude with girlfriend went out of his way to hold the door open for me.
I am, for now, fussing over the (I think) designer purse I got on sale at Macy’s, admiring its white soft leather, with black detailing and a bit of chrome finish. Does it matter that before I was carrying a fraying vinyl vintage purse whose striking pattern had been, shall we say, somewhat diminished by the accompanying toddler ink scribbles? Of course we know the answer is both no, and yes.
Yes, it matters to feel sharp (ened).
(Personal finance experts say you need to build “you” money into your budget, so that you stick with it. What they should say is that you need that safety release valve, because pent-up demand unleashed could be a weapon of mass destruction.)
The joy has been deliciously contagious.
Did I mention that because we just closed on the refinance, we have no mortgage payment this month?
Of course, for the clothing spree, some overage was allowed.
And then I went out with a girlfriend to a Roller Girls screamfest.
And then at the grocery store last week, I took the store up on its ridiculous offer of free eggs if you buy “X, Y, and Z.” I knew that I would spend more than if I’d just bought the eggs. I even told myself I was rationalizing. To no avail.
(It was only $20 over, but my husband went $20 over the last time, and I did the time before, and before you know it, there goes the grocery budget.)
I have no regrets.
Except that what goes up must come down.
“You know we’ve been spending money lately like we have no budget, right?”
This, last night at the dinner table.
“Yeah,” I say with a sidelong glance. “It’s been fun.”
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It was fun, indeed. It will be satisfying to create a budget we can stick to. It will be refreshing to have a cushion in savings. But I doubt it will be as fun. Hopefully I am wrong.
yes I too often get sucked into this need/desire/trance into spending money. it is usually a sesonal thing, i go on a budget (very tight lately) and stick with it, but leave out things…for awhile and then spend as I want until i realize that the money tree has shriveled.
so thanks for syaing what I am feeling and making me not feel like an odd duck.
@Diana: the money tree has shriveled — exactly!
Just catching up on all these posts. So am I to assume that the money that would have gone to your mortgage paid down the credit card balance? (crickets)???