Yesterday as I was getting out of my car a man approached me with some story about trying to get to a hospital.
At first I thought he just wanted directions. Then I realized I’d heard his story before:
Trying to get to a hospital. Ran out of gas. Need some help. I’m not threatening you.
Several years ago I was taken in hook, line, and sinker by this story. It comes in many variations — but usually involves some combination of a baby and running out of gas.
Today I told him I was sorry, but that I didn’t have any money on me. Which is usually true. Yesterday, technically, not so true. I had $1 on me. But that was my reflex.
What I should have said is, “I’ve heard this story before, and you don’t have to lie to me. You’re asking for help. So tell me what you’re really asking for?”
That probably would have involved more interaction than either of us were prepared for. But I wonder what might have been the outcome.
I have this friend who, though, at the time when he lived here, had nothing, is the most generous guy I’ve ever known. He would always keep change in his pockets specifically to help out anyone who asked. I think of him every time I don’t help in these small ways.
I’ll be blogging more about charity and allocating resources toward it, but isn’t it always the little things like this that really stick in your head?
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Tags: sucker factor2 Comments
People don’t generally react well to being accused of lying, even if it’s obvious they are lying. A couple dollars is trivial, so I try to give a couple of dollars if I think it will help the person get through the misery of their day that much more easily.
Those that work in the world service to those who need food, shelter, and other basic (!) needs would discourage you from giving out money to those asking for it on the street. Of course, this is a complicated, multi-layered issue, and the traction (that you mentioned) with another person that is required to truly “help” someone is more about your time and sharing resources than it is about giving them the $1 in your pocket. It will be fun to see what you blog about in this topic area.